

Give them something to be distracted with. It seems to be positive to structure a conversation with high conflict disputes, in which the people involved would feel more in control and would be able to see the future, where would meet their expectations and potential for a resolution.Įxplain what you expect to be the ground rules (e.g. It is clear that connecting with whoever you are conversing with would help the parties to be more open and cooperative.Ĭreate and explain the structural process of the conversation. What to DO in those disputes 1) Connect Building rapport in the initial moment of contact is pivotal for the continuous conversation with the parties. In mediation I encounter a lot of high conflict people that are difficult and usually rigid in their positions, where makes the mediation more complicated to be resolved.


Those are important areas to focus on when in dispute with a high conflict person, in which could be in a professional setting or a personal one. Hans Kohler Converter 2 Professional Setting Or Many times people try to explain a certain behavior related to the high conflict person with a diagnostic, hence it would bias your view of the case and the person itself, so avoid from trying to diagnose their condition if there is any.

Keep yourself cooperative and remain neutral in those situations. In case of using a positive anecdote, then could be positive into change the conflict in a positive way, however be cautious to use it in high conflict disputes, I personally would not use it in this type of disputes. What NOT to do 1) Do not give advices - I completely agree that giving advices to someone that is a high conflict person would be detrimental for the potentiality of resolving the conflict, as the person would not be able to listen to what you need to say, and would see it as a personal attack 2) Forget about using the Past It is common today that people in hot emotional field mode would see your illustration of the past as extremely negative and as you are trying to show that you are right and they are wrong. I have dealt with a lot of High Conflict People over the years, either in court mediations, private clients that are couples, or with individuals in recovery, therefore I have successfully use many of these strategies with them. Hence I will share my take aways from it and I will add some of my perspectives and studies on it as well.
